Chapter 1: The beginning of the journey
This photo was taken from my very first Domme photoshoot! Major “Baby Domme” vibes :-)
Welcome to my perverted little corner of the internet! I’m so glad you’ve joined me here, and I hope you’ve taken the time to better acquaint yourself with me and my interests. Building this website has been a labor of love, and I’m excited to use it as a way of connecting with subs, fellow FemDoms, and the kink community in general.
One of the first questions people (vanilla and kinky alike!) tend to ask me when I talk about my training journey is “What’s it like being in a Domme mentorship?”. It’s difficult to answer that question succinctly, so I wanted my first blog post to share with you how it all began and how deeply it’s impacted me thus far. As much as I like to indulge in tease and denial, it’s also fun to remove the blindfold and tell you about all the fun, kinky things I’ve been up to…
I first approached Lucy Sweetkill about the possibility of taking me on as a mentee in early 2020–it was something I had spent a lot of time mulling over. I felt inspired as I watched Lily Kasai, one of Lucy’s most recent mentees, grow into a competent and graceful Domme under her guidance. Even at that nascent stage in my BDSM journey, I could tell Lucy was a pillar of knowledge and was well-respected in the kink community. I wanted to ensure that I could trust and respect the person that would become my teacher, and Lucy easily made it to the top of the list. So, I crafted a (very long!) email to her, willed up the courage to send it, and hoped she would even entertain the idea of chatting with me. I am happy to say she did and we started my training in April of 2021 (it would have started sooner if not for a tiny, little global pandemic). It’s been a blur since then!
Lucy Sweetkill, Dia Dynasty, Lily Kasai, myself, and pain puppy at a kink event. Some of my favorite perverts!
Needless to say, Lucy’s mentorship is comprehensive. From the very first day, she had me with her in sessions, shadowing, participating in small ways, and taking notes. She would dissect scenes with me, encourage me to ask her questions, tell me to describe how I interpreted certain activities or dynamics, all the while inspiring me to think critically and holistically about BDSM practices. She stressed the importance of constant practice (“Tie ropes when you’re watching TV at home!”), how to run a strong, professional business (“Remember everything can be screenshot”), and most importantly, how to stay true to myself both in and out of scenes (“Be authentic to you and your beliefs, and the right people will find you”). Thank you Lucy, for being the best mentor/Mama Bear a new Domme could ask for!
Through Lucy, I’ve met people who have become dear friends and I’ve been exposed to a wonderfully supportive and generous kink community. This journey has been so much more than simply learning proper technique and business skills–none of this would be nearly as meaningful without the company of the friends, weirdos, and pervs I’ve met along the way who have wholeheartedly accepted my kinks and assisted in my BDSM education.
Becoming a Domme is not without its challenges: battling bouts of imposter syndrome, classic cycles of “compare and despair” on social media, and of course, fighting against systems and platforms that don’t want sex workers to exist in any capacity. This is not an easy life to choose, but I wholeheartedly feel that for me, the good outweighs the bad and my ability to confront a challenge head-on has served me well.
Reading back on the initial email I wrote to Lucy in 2020 I was struck by this passage:
Powerful women are something I simultaneously desire to be around and hope to be. To pursue the balance of femininity and power has been a continuous and conscious aspiration of mine since I was a young girl, and to see it embodied so gracefully by women I admire is the ultimate manifestation of my own nebulous dreams of personal power and autonomy.
Rereading this email, it seems like the words of a different person, which is certainly a good indicator of how far I’ve come in this journey. I’m witnessing these “nebulous dreams” become concrete reality in front of my eyes, and I am now the powerful woman I so longingly aspired to be. I’m deeply excited for the challenges, joy, and accomplishment that the future holds. Thank you for coming on this ride with me–I hope that it’s a long one. ✷
